Postpartum Recovery Myths

Ah, postpartum recovery.

That magical time when everyone tells you to “sleep when the baby sleeps” (ha!) and drink lots of water, as if hydration alone will fix the fact that you just performed a full-blown miracle and are now expected to function like a human being while running on two hours of broken sleep and leftover Goldfish crackers.

If you’re pregnant with your first baby, you’ve probably heard a lot about what postpartum is supposed to be like. But let me tell you something—there are myths. Lies, even. And today, we’re busting them wide open.

Myth #1: “You'll bounce back in six weeks.”

Oh, sweet summer child. Six weeks is an arbitrary number some well-meaning but delusional person picked out of a hat decades ago.

In reality, at six weeks postpartum, your uterus is maybe back to its normal size, but your body? Your energy? Your emotions? All still figuring it out. Some women feel great by then, but many are still dealing with hormone swings, exhaustion, and wondering if they’ll ever be able to sneeze without clenching again.

Your body just grew an entire person. You’re not “bouncing” anywhere, and that’s okay.

Myth #2: “Breastfeeding makes the weight just fall off!”

You know what else breastfeeding does? Makes you hungrier and thirstier than you’ve ever been in your life.

For every calorie you burn feeding your baby, your body whispers, Girl, go eat a sandwich. Or five. Some women do lose weight quickly while breastfeeding. Others find that their bodies cling to every ounce of fat like a toddler gripping your leg when you try to pee alone.

Either way, you are nourishing a human. Your body is amazing. Let it do its thing.

Myth #3: “You’ll feel like yourself again in no time.”

Listen, postpartum is like a weird alternate dimension. Time doesn’t work the same way. The first few weeks? A blur. One day you wake up and realize it’s been a month and you don’t remember the last time you shaved your legs or wore pants that weren’t made of elastic.

Feeling like yourself again takes time. And honestly? You might not go back to who you were exactly—because now, you’re a mother. And that changes you. In amazing, powerful, and yes, sometimes overwhelming ways.

So give yourself grace. Be kind to your new self. She’s doing a damn good job.

Myth #4: “Your hair falls out because you’re stressed.”

Oh no, my friend. This is hormonal betrayal at its finest. Around three or four months postpartum, your hair will start falling out in chunks, and you will wonder if you are slowly balding.

You’re not. It’s just your body making up for the fact that pregnancy gave you those thick, luscious locks. And don’t worry—eventually, it will grow back, often in the form of weird little baby hairs that make you look like you’re constantly being electrocuted.

Myth #5: “If you just do kegels, everything will be fine down there.”

First of all, kegels are great, but they are not a cure-all for the interesting things that happen to your pelvic floor after childbirth.

Some women feel totally normal down there within weeks. Others pee a little every time they sneeze for a while (or forever). Some need pelvic floor therapy (which, by the way, is amazing and should be offered to every postpartum woman).

The point? If something doesn’t feel right, don’t just assume “this is my life now.” Talk to a doctor, a physical therapist, or someone who understands that peeing yourself every time you laugh at a meme is not just part of the mom experience.

The Truth About Postpartum Recovery

Postpartum is messy, weird, beautiful, and nothing like the highlight reels you see on Instagram.

It’s crying because your baby is perfect. It’s crying because you’re exhausted. It’s wearing adult diapers for longer than you thought possible. It’s realizing that your body is strong, resilient, and worthy of love exactly as it is.

And most of all? It’s realizing that no matter how crazy it gets, you’re not alone.

You got this, momma. 💛

Naomi